And we urge you, brothers, to admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, and be patient with everyone. – 1 Thessalonians 5:14
There is something striking about the last part of this verse. Paul does not simply tell us to be patient with certain people. After describing several different kinds of people and the ways they may need help, he adds, “be patient with everyone.” That includes the people who are difficult to understand, slow to change, or simply different from us.
Why does Paul connect patience with helping others?
The people Paul describes need different kinds of care. Some need correction. Others are discouraged and need encouragement. The weak need help. There is no single response that will fit everyone. That may be part of what makes the command to be patient so important. Loving people requires us to pay attention to what they actually need rather than reacting to them according to our own preferences.
It is easy to become frustrated when someone does not respond the way we think they should. We may want a quick change, a better attitude, or a more sensible decision. But God does not ask us to love only the people who make loving them easy. He calls us to patience with everyone.
What does patience look like when people are difficult?
Patience does not mean pretending that problems do not exist. Paul has already said to admonish the unruly. There are times when love speaks honestly and calls someone back to what is right. But even correction is meant to take place within a larger posture of love.
We can tell the truth without becoming harsh. We can help someone without treating them as a burden. We can encourage the fainthearted without becoming impatient with their weakness.
This is where humility matters. A sheep does not become a shepherd simply because it has noticed another sheep wandering. We are all dependent on the patience of God. We all have areas where we are slow to learn, slow to change, or in need of someone else’s help.
What can patience teach us about love?
Patience reminds us that people are not projects to be completed on our schedule. God is at work in people, and His work often takes longer than we would prefer.
Sometimes the most loving thing we can do is remain present. We can listen again. We can pray again. We can offer encouragement again. We can give someone room to grow without withdrawing our love from them.
That kind of patience reflects something of the heart of our Shepherd. He does not deal with us according to the speed at which we would like to become mature. He patiently leads His sheep, corrects us when necessary, strengthens us when we are weak, and continues to care for us. Perhaps that is why Paul ends this list so broadly: “be patient with everyone.” We may not know what another person is carrying, how much they are struggling, or how much growth is still ahead of them. We do know how much patience God has shown us.
So today, before frustration takes over, it may be worth remembering that the person in front of us is someone God loves. We can be truthful without being harsh, helpful without being proud, and patient without giving up. Sometimes love looks remarkably ordinary. It simply stays.
Be patient with everyone, remembering how patiently our Shepherd has cared for you.